sexual sportswear

Acid Midget: Oxford St gays spotted, moving northbound in pack formation. Over.

_______: Where are they headed?

AM: Can’t confirm that yet. They appear to be high on disco biscuits and are chewing their own faces off.

_______: Sounds serious. What’s their trajectory?

AM: Leaving Oxford St’s cocks-balls-and-butts district and are approaching Pie Face, sir.

_______: Godammit! They have such delicious pies there. What’s their profile?

AM: Sir, aaah, they are wearing red and yellow Speedos, swimming caps and Cons. They also have enough bronzer smeared on their bodies to give Mr. T a hard-on. Sir.

_______: Those assholes! How do they incorporate masculine stereotypes in such an unconventional way?

AM: I don’t know sir. Maybe they’re eclectic.

_______: Yes, I suppose they are. Follow them and report back to me. Find out everything about them – I wanna know their destination and where they’re based. Hell, I wanna know their favourite Britney track.

AM: Understood sir. Over and out.